Icy

I'm numb
that's what this is
Or icy & cold
Or frozen inside
Or maybe I'm fire
all molten ablaze
I'm not sure
I'm lost
Can't get out of the maze

In a daze
is this what it feels
like when you're no
longer in love
when you reach for the
stars that aren't
there anymore
Is this what it feels like
when there's nothing
to do
except think, and ponder
and wander anew.

Is this what the aftermath
is like when you're coping
not laughing, or crying
not weeping or joking.
Is this what it feels like
when your heart is breaking
Or maybe it's broken
Oh why am I shaking.

Is this what it feels like
to be truly alone
to be lost in your mind
when there's nobody home
Is this my worst nightmare
to be trapped in this fog
With no hope of rescue
No hope of God

It's the ice, that i'm feeling
there's no fire or passion
Just dull, boring senses
that no longer matter
It's the cold, freezing chill
Of the lonliest people
that's now in my bones
And spreading it's feeling

My heart is now frozen
The Snow Queen is in
There's no real emotion
It's too hard.
It's no sin.
There's no more safety
there is plenty to fear
I'm going to sleep now
I don't want to hear

Sorry

I haven't been to see you
I haven't even called
I want to be so close to you
But there's a distance
There's a wall

I wish I knew how to say it
I wish I could speak those words
But it's been so long
I'm afraid of what could go wrong

Are you asking me for too much
You want the truth & not a lie
It's hard to hold on to you
When my vision is going blind

I'm trying to reach out for you
but it seems so hard to do
I'll keep on trying
I'll keep on fighting
One day, one day soon

Who am I and Who I am

Who am I
And how was I made
Am I a jigsaw puzzle
made of lots of different pieces
and is every piece of me
Made from what other people shaped

Who I am
I am a piece of music
A piece of fiction
a piece of a person
a piece of a soul
a piece of a spirit
a piece of creation
a piece of the God who made me now
a piece of you and what you are too me
a piece of her & what she gave me
a piece of him & how he loved or hated me
a piece of whoever is in my life right now

Who am I
and is this the way
I should be
Made up of pieces that other
people gave me?